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It was a lovely summer. Full of friends, celebrations of love, kitty snuggles, kisses, mountain adventures, midnight trains to Montauk, beach days, sparklers (!), and so much more.

Per the usual, I noticed the shifting season at the end of July, but I wasn't as overcome as I usually am with the worry and fear of the fall. I've been painting a bunch and have a whole new series that I can't wait to share. Some of the paintings have been in progress for several months and even still - they aren't quite finished. I was deep into painting tiny little dots with a number 2 long liner, when I had a revelation: Tiny Brush Meditation.

What was (is) missing from many of these are the tiniest of details. When pausing to ask myself if I'd rather have the painting "finished", I reminded myself that I enjoy the process of painting. I love creating, mixing colors, and making little moments. Sometimes I pretend that the little details of white are tiny spirits coming to life.In many ways, this can be translated to my day-to-day life. While I have a grand vision for what I want to be doing and how much I'd like to hold onto moments of happiness and keep them in pretty, little boxes; I know I can't. That there are lots of moments and changes to come. That I can only have some idea of what's in store, but the only thing I can really control is myself. Not to mention, the actual living part of life can be rather enjoyable. When you let it.

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More photos of summer. 

**Exploring an abandoned apartment building/hotel (?) somewhere in Pennsylvania (post Poconos trip).

Not pictured: The absolute eeriness of the place. 

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Fireworks, friends, singing, waking up early to watch the sunrise and enjoying long sunsets. What a perfect weekend. Although, it was a little strange to find the random person sleeping on our roof at 5:00 am.

Not pictured: Getting to ride on the back of a motorcycle! Our family is too big for one little car! | The funny cards on the Evil Apples game (it's just like Cards Against Humanity, but in an app-version. You just need a good wi-fi connection!) | Our amazing rendition of Cell Block Tango | Just how much my heart sparkles for my handsome, dreamy man - the fireworks got nothing on my love sparkles. *✧*

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I often talk about my garden of friends. How each relationship in my life is like a flower, which I try and nurture and grow. Over the past few months, my garden has really grown and it is absolutely beautiful. I don't know how I got so lucky, but I am so very thankful. ❤

pictured: delicious breakfasts and typical morning moments | 10 in 10 | the view after a glorious hammock nap | the pups | fireflies (all of the tiny green dots) | poolside reading | caesar loved the water, but it was slightly terrifying swimming with him - he also had a particularly affinity for one | final selfies at squirrel run!not pictured: how freaking delicious the food was | leading a morning yoga sequence and making us shoot love-sparkle wishes in warrior two | the silliness of having three happy pups in a house | game night with the funniest descriptions of taboo i have ever heard | just HOW beautiful the fireflies were, it looked like the trees were filled with twinkling christmas lights | the million times caesar jumped in the pool and how terribly he smelled after | watching back to the future and many world cup games. 

full set

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There’s a thing about listening to yourself – the deep-to-the-core kind of listening that helps you follow your heart. You realize that you’re a lot stronger and smarter than you ever gave yourself credit for. That the answers you were looking for, were always with you.

Over a year ago I told myself that I needed three months – a brief period of time to wear the “sorting hat” – to figure out things out.In the colder months, I finally took that time.

This wasn’t always easy and there were moments of blue. Honest and difficult conversations were had with myself. I learned to appreciate the nicety in feeling attractive, but learned to hold my eager heart.Love is a wonderful feeling, but finding the person that moves your core is different - it shakes your soul.

My heart stopped the day I saw a tall, dark-haired boy with amazing curls and it started skipping when I saw him walking towards me. My crush was obvious to our mutual friends and, eventually, I worked up the courage to share it with him. There were a bunch of firsts and just like that it started to fall into place.

I am beyond grateful – for my friends, the sunshine, and my curiosity and imagination for this life. My heart smiles knowing that I’ve found my true sparkle partner.

It just took me finding myself first.♥

There's something about the shift from summer to fall that just gets me, and not necessarily in a good way. The truth is, it starts very early. The shift begins at the end of July - when the sky is the haziest and the leaves are somewhere between slightly-wilted and getting ready to crisp for the fall. Don't get me wrong, there are plenty of things I love about the season; cider and layers and falling leaves and cooler nights. Although, let's be honest ... the best parts of Fall are far too brief in New York. Not enough bright yellow leaves and crisp blue days.

I've gotten much better at identifying the moments that are a little harder for me. The ones that I work really hard to rush through, but feel painfully slow. I've found that in "being" with whatever-comes-up, I'm able to move through it - just a bit faster.

It's easiest for me to get to the other side by noticing the beauty that is everywhere. In the small details of a moment. In the ability to remember and to look forward.It's especially easy when you're away from the city and the Berkshires are perfect for this.

*not pictured* - rushing out of the city, leaving much later than planned, and arriving even later than originally expected - due to lack of cell service, we ended up creeping around houses; looking into windows and everything trying to figure out which one was our destination. it didn't help that there were two houses with the same address, but we decided it was highly unlikely that someone would rent a house with a gaping hole on the front porch. thankfully, we found the house. | kayaking on a big pond and going through the marsh, into the tiny stream of lily pads and wild orchids | having a nice conversation with locals on the water | finding lots of treasures in the woods, including exploding touch-me-nots and toads! | the amazing cookies at the gypsy joynt, the birthday cake cookie was the. best. (if you're ever in great barrington, go. also try this) 

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*full set here* 

Waking up at 5:00 am (I immediately fell back asleep after taking this). Messages of love. Pretty sunsets on above-ground trains. Pretty sunsets from the edges of Brooklyn. A kitty so happy she's drooling. My favorite golden evening light. Things in full bloom and greenery everywhere. Finding quaint places with dreamy backdrops like this one. // yes, this is summer.

A couple of weeks ago, I took another midnight train to Montauk with a couple of gals who also decided to brave the weather. Admittedly, part of me wondered if we were crazy considering the forecast had storm clouds and lightening bolts for the entire day, but we were ready for an adventure come hell or high water; in our case I guess we meant this literally. But my little request to mother nature must have been heard (thank you!) because it did not rain from 4:00-7:00 am. It's during this time that the world begins to stir, but not enough to find a place of shelter.

When you take a midnight train (actually, 12:38-ish am) you arrive at "the end" (seriously, it's a stump) around 4:00 am. From there it's a nice, long walk to the beach. We ignored about 5-6 cabs honking and asking, "are you sure you don't need a ride - you don't even have to pay." We politely declined and explained that we were there to watch the sunrise. Normally, they'd just drive away, but considering the dense. gray. fog almost all of the cabbies surveyed the sky, our backpacks, shook their heads and drove away. It was a little crazy to arrive at the cold, dark beach at 4:45-ish am. The fog was so dense we could hardly see a thing, but the swelling sounds of crashing waves informed us how close the water was.

We did not see a sunrise, per-say, but we did see the light tilt and shift it's way from the darkest black, to purplish-orange, to a gray-blue, and eventually land on middle gray. By the time we left the beach, we realized we were soaked because the fog made it as if we were in a cloud. There was about an hour of wandering while waiting for the first diner to open, but the rest of the day was spent with dark and stormy's (oh-so-apropo), riding in the free trolly blasted with free coconut water signage (the new coffee coconut water = yum {I guess the ads worked}), a sun shower (okay, an actual rain-shower, but it didn't last that long), and discussing buddha cats and the purpose of life.

You know those days that you just. live. This was one of them and it was glorious, despite the rain.

Not pictured: Nicole getting feisty with the guy that started skateboarding on the train at 3:00 am when most people were sleeping. Everyone cheered after she yelled | Me swimming after having a couple of said, dark and stormy's | Oh, and the woman eating blueberries with chopsticks at the diner at 7:00 am. **

// little known fact about the street from the last photo....besides holding my lovely fence flowers, it's also the street that clementine and joely drive on in eternal sunshine for the spotless mind (one of my favorite movies ever). it's in the scene where they are driving away from her house after she picks up her toothbrush. the houses are on the passenger side, but you can see the hess gas station that had these lines after sandy. 

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full set 

**for the record, i was actually trying to take photos of all of those birds in flight. it was so pretty to see them swirling around, but i think he thought i was taking his photo - hence the last pose.

Great music (The Milk Carton Kids, Lumineers, and Old Crow Medicine Show) + great friends = a wonderful evening!The photos are blurry and sparse because I wasn't actually supposed to have my camera, but because this was a big deal for my dear friend, Francesca, (her bf is one of the MCK and was playing in Central Park - eek so cool!!!), I decided to sneak it out again. Dancing and swaying under the stars when all three bands came out for the finale was just awesome.I had a "moment" that night. At some point, I looked up, noticed the Big Dipper and decided it was a perfect place for my summer blues. I threw my hands into the air and said, "goodbye summer depression, funk, whatever-you-are/were, see ya later!" It sounds silly, but I allowed myself to leave those feelings into the night air - to accept the stuff from the past few months and just let go. Releasing that energy allowed me to move. In what direction I'm not entirely sure, but movement is good. It allows room for so much more, forgiveness, compassion, and maybe there will be hope for love or at least shoulder to rest my head on while looking at stars. Surely, what I released that night can be turned into something more beautiful. Perhaps a meteor shower."Stars should not be seen alone. That’s why there are so many. Two people should stand together and look at them. One person alone will surely miss the good ones." - Augusten Burroughs

A few weeks ago, we had some friends come hang out at the Krull-tail apartment. "The pipe" is what Hayden used to share the air conditioning between the two rooms - this made for a very confused kitty. We ate pizza, happend upon a bazaar, ate fried oreos, wandered the neighborhood, and I took photos without autofocusing. They still turned out neat and it was a fun night.

 

Well, here we are. The last month of summer.August. Overgrown greenery and the beginning of crisp leaves. Beautiful evening light. The last of the longest days and preparation for a cool (hopefully, but doubtful - I hate climate change) fall.We will enjoy afternoon tea for a wedding celebration in Chicago and welcome the return of dear friends who made a huge difference halfway around the world.This summer had rough patches and this little heart has been pushed and pulled in too many directions, but we're getting through it. Just a little bit at a time. *direct link*

  **Feature photo and 1,4,8,13,14, and 15 by the very talented John Kester! 

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Hello July,Summer is here. Summer is hot. The kitties sleep on their back with their bellies in the air.We have many fun plans this month, including a day of berry picking and running through wildflowers. Mischief will be made at this year's MP3 experiment and we will enjoy the rooftop with our French friends. The guitar will be re-strung with attempts to play at an open mic.July means beach days, clear skies and puffy clouds.The sky will shift and the greens will begin to fade ever-so-slightly. This will stir some feelings, but we will enjoy the moments because we are learning to live with change.

August is in full bloom and summer is ending. I've been enjoying these fence flowers for the past few months. Standing on my tip toes to smell them, hoping I don't run into a bumble bee!Let's hope Irene doesn't blow away them away. New York folks - stay safe!